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Lilly’s Losers

November 9th, 2017

Hall County High School Football

The regular season came to an end last Friday, and we are now on to the all-important playoff time of year. The old and crusty elephants from the beginning of the year came out again and lost to the other school in Buford, and Lakeview sadly also ended the year on a sour note by losing to the cadets of Riverside. Lotti’s Lads were shown no mercy by the Catholic’s over at Blessed Trinity, but they still made the playoffs.  Johnson did not make the playoffs this year after a loss to, where in the world, is Loganville. The horticulture school stood tall and played well against the always talented Buford wolves. The E Hall Vikings were plundering new lands once again with a good win over the hapless Rebs of Fannin County.

 

Posted by Buttermilk:

North Hall VS. Monroe Area

The Northen Nation had a much better regular season they anyone expected. So, they should be proud to be in the playoffs. However, their season will for sure end in Monroe where the tropical storm colored purple will blow Bishop’s boys all the way back to Hall County. Look for a category five beating of the men in green.

Lilly’s Loser- North Hall

East Hall VS. Morgan County

The Vikings from the East of Hall have tried to conquer new lands all year. They will sail the tall ships into Morgan County for another battle with the 9-1 slobber dogs. The fight will not last long, and the dogs will chew up the men with fur and horns like squeaky toys quickly.  There will be no new lands to plunder after being treated like kibbles and bits for  E Hall.

Lilly’s Loser- East Hall

Gainesville VS. Alpharetta

They say elephants travel many miles to find the elusive “elephant graveyard” before they die. The Reds will stomp many miles down highway 400 and see a pigskin burial ground in posh Alpharetta. The high tax of North Fulton would kill most people, but their excellent football team will be enough to end the GHS season for the year.

Lilly’s Loser- Gainesville.

West Hall VS. ST. Pious X

The greeks of Oakwood will mount off with spears and shields for a class down in the ATL with yet another Catholic team this week. The X men of Pious will not ask for a confession of Lotti’s Lads, and they will give a homily to the West men. They will, however, provide them with a beating and send then home ice cold to the once Hot Gates in Western Hall.

Lilly’s Loser- West Hall

Flowery Branch VS. Kell

The hunting birds will take on the snorting steers from Marietta at the Falcons Nest in South Hall. The Branch has soared on high this season, and they will continue their hunting ways by pecking the Longhorns all night long. In the end, there will be some good steaks served at the horticulture school with lots of steak sauce!

Lilly’s Loser- Kell

 

College Football

The Dawgs whipped the Cocks to move to 9-0 for the first time since 1982 last week. This sets up a big match with Aubarn who took out a pesky Arkansas team. The Tide rolled once again and left the kitty cats of LSpew out in the cold. Coach Richt had his tropical storms up to eat some VA Tech fried chicken down in Miami. The little men who love the green from South Bend beat a talented Wake Forrest team, and FSU rolled that orange mascot of the Cuse back to New York with bruises all over it. Last, Clemson had a good win in Raleigh over a fierce pack of Wolves. However, they lost a lot of towels, and the refs were sent away with some nasty parting gifts.

 

Posted by The Jungle Cat:

Georgia at The Loveliest Village on the Plains
Once again, it’s time for the south’s oldest football feud. Coach Kirby and his Kennel have the Bulldog faithful once again dreaming of “Sugar falling from the sky.”
The Tigers, aka Plainsmen, aka War Eagles, control their destiny and a possible trip to Atlanta. Football guru Gus has been spending late hours in his pigskin laboratory experimenting how to best use his smoke and mirrors offense. Gus will need all the resources he can muster, including fire hoses, to keep this pack of Dogs at bay. No miracle at Jordan-Hare this year, only the nation’s numero uno team on a mission.

Lilly’s Loser: Auburn and the fire hoses

Alabama at Mississippi State

These days, most followers of football mythology will tell you that Kirby’s Kennel and Darth Saban are on track for a collision in Atlanta.
First things first. “The Dark Side…The Crimson Tide” Must make a 90-mile junket to Stark-Vegas and The Land of Cowbells.
Darth Saban and the Tide hold a 79-18 lead in this series and have not lost to Cowbell U since Nick started drawing O’s and X’s in T-town.
Since arriving in Star Vegas football general Dan Mullen has given the once named Maroons much to shake their bells about on the gridiron. The question on everyone’s mind in maroon and white is, will Dan be trying to make a silk purse out of a Gator hide next year?

Lilly’s Loser-Mississippi State

 

Posted by the Bookkeeper:

The South Bend leprechauns take the bus to Coral Gables this weekend to stare into the eye of the formidable Miami Hurricanes, who have the longest winning streak in the FBS. The last team to beat them?  None other than the bad-tempered potato farmers.  With both teams playing for an invite to the BCS Ball, the Irish blood is boiling, and the U is for Unbeaten. In the end, we think it’ll be the Irish thanking their lucky stars.

Lilly’s Loser in a brawl-Miami.

 

Posted by the Presbyterian Padre:

Clemson vs. FSU:

Chief Osceola and tribe from Tallahassee roll into Clemson’s Death Valley with an unusual 3-5 record on the year.  But don’t be fooled, Jimbo’s gang will bring their A-game with ‘em.  The Seminoles would love nothing more than to scalp the 4th-ranked Pickens County cats.  Indeed there are plenty of arrows left in their quiver, but their OL has more holes in it than America’s southern border, and Clemson’s D will roll right through it.

Lilly’s Losers-FSU

 

Virginia Tech vs. Georgia Tech:

The Gobble Gobbles from Virginia Tech is coming off an embarrassing performance at Miami.   Bobby Dodd’s Bees have lost four games this year, and Paul Johnson would like to avoid another.  No one wants to be home for Christmas, so if the Jackets plan to celebrate the arrival of the Santa Claus on the road, they need to pluck the turkeys from Blacksburg.  This one is a head-scratcher, but no one likes to play Johnson’s old school offense.

Lilly’s Losers-Virginia Tech

 

Posted by Buttermilk:

Syracuse VS. Wake Forrest

There will be some demons roaming around upper New York looking to torment the Orangemen this weekend. However, these spirits are not very frightening, and there will be no need to perform an exorcism on the field. Quarterback Eric Dungey will enough to ward off the Deacons and send them back to Winston Salem for more theology training.

Lilly’s Loser- Wake Forest

 

Lilly’s Losers is in honor of Leonard Postero who created the original Leonard’s Losers. Many fans, to this day, love the wit and humor of his football prognostications.

These musing are just for fun during the high school and NCAA football seasons.

Also, we will miss our friend Shaw Carter. He was a better man than all of us!

 

The team:

Buttermilk- John N. Lilly III (UGA)

Jungle Cat- JC Smith (Alabama)

The Bookkeeper- Rusty Hopkins (West Bromwich Albion)

Presbyterian Padre- Pastor Stacey Cox (Clemson)

A. D. Winston (Gainesville High School)

 

 

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